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Caption Archive Captions from previous months   February 2005   Example: Doctor:  "I'm sorry, but I've just been called to the ER so I'll have to hand you over to my colleague, Dr. Grover."              From:  Matt Doctor:  "Well, sir, I'd say that the nose job was a complete success..."              From:  GelflingWaldo Doctor:  "I don't think he's breathing, nurse. He's turned blue!"              From:  John M. Doctor:  "I'm sorry to infom you sir, but your insurance policy does not cover the surgical replacement of your funny bone."              From:  Quentin Doctor:  "Wow, Doc!  On Valentine's, he's 'love sick.'"              From:  0dysseus Doctor:  "No, it's not appendicitis you're feeling.  It's the Hand of Oz, and it will have to be removed."              From:  Gary Doctor:  "You know, I'm not really a doctor.  But I've played one on TV."              From:  PM Doctor:  "I mean it, your skin really is purple.  People just need to adjust their monitors."              From:  MHB Doctor:  "Moon river...wider than a mile...I'm crossing you in style, One day..."              From:  A.A. Fussy Doctor:  "I was an surgeon specialising in alien surgey in my later life, but your funny bone is like Invader Zim."              From:  Joan Doctor:  "Oops!! Where'd the duct tape go?"              From:  Alesha Fat Blue:  "What is going on here? It looks like this suregon is trying to kill me rather than fix me up! 'Get me out of here.'" Doctor: "'Please keep still.  You will feel all better when I am done.' Let me take your brains out, HEEE!"     November 2004-January 2005     Photo Courtesy of Phillip Chapman   Example: Bill:  "All right ladies and gentlemen. Next is a little event Kev and I thought up right before the show. It involves Jerry's infamous beard...we call it 'Who Wants to Shave a Muppeteer?'"              From:  Rumtar_10165 Kevin:  "Ladies and gentlemen, Bill has tried one of Aunt Bea's home-made pickles, Tell us, what do you think?" Bill:  (Can't speak. Mubbles) Kevin:  (Looks at Jerry) "What did he say?" Jerry:  (Does Floyd's voice) "Man, I cant speak Mubble."              From:  Chase *thinking* .....It looks....like he's gonna spit on the microphone.              From:  Beauregard Jerry:  "Bill, that is not an ice cream. It's a microphone." Bill:  "I want my mommy!"              From:  John M. Kevin:  "Alright Jerry, I admit it. I had confessed to the authorities about Gonzo being an alien."              From:  MuppetDude Jerry:  "WHO'S better at playing Lew Zealand?!"              From:  Jerry Jerry:  "I don't care what you dudes are gonna do, but I'm not working for the mouse and that's final!"              From:  Kristen Bill:  "Everyone may I have your attention please!" Jerry:  "Yea he gets all the attention!" Kevin:  "Hahah"              From:  Wes Jerry:  "Man I own You guys!!"     September/October 2004      Example: Fat Blue:  "You're right!  That tooth does look like Phyllis Diller!"            From:  Gererd G-Man Lyon Fat Blue:  "Now say awwwwwwwwwwwwwwww so I can get a look at that molar.  Say you look familiar, anyone in your family work at restaurants?"            From:  Beauregard Grover:  "Me, cookie monster in disguise!  Ah, um, um, um, um, yum."            From:  John M. Grover:  "Oh my gosh sir, I think your forehead is showing me your future."            From:  Jim Fat Blue:  "Would you like a breath mint? Please..."            From:  Matty O. Fat Blue:  "Can you say "Ah" a bit louder, please? I think I'm going deaf."            From:  Chase Woolner "Here check my breath."            From:  BobStone "Gloryoski! You've swallowed Goldilocks!"       August 2004      Example: Floyd:  "Hey man, what's the deal with these heavy-duty noses?" Fozzie:  "I think the doctor I found did a great job on us." Kermit:  "Fozzie, when we said 'plastic surgery,' we didn't mean real plastic..."              From:  Beauregard Floyd:  "Hey, who replaced my prop with Hot Custard?" Kermit:  "Where, let me see that." Fozzie:  "Who-ha-ha! Everyone falls for the Hot Custard gag, wocka, wocka!"              From:  Ryan Dillon It's The Muppet Show, with our very special guest, GROUCHO MARX! Yaay!              From:  Gererd Lyon Floyd:  "'I've got a great idea' you said. 'Let's put phony noses on' you said. 'It'll be fun' you said.'" Fozzie:  "Well how was I supposed to know that the noses would make the London Zoo think that we were extremely rare goggle-eyed dodo's.  No offense Kermit." Kermit:  "None taken Fozzie...I think."              From:  Chase "We're taking this here jar of Hot Mustard and there's no way you can stop us....or identify us on a counta we're wearing these nifty disguises."              From:  Kye Floyd:  "I think we should ask for our money back! Not one of us looks like David Hasselhoff!"              From:  The Narrator Floyd:  "Hey man, how are we gonna disguise the hot mustard? It don't got ears or a nose to hold up the glasses." Kermit:  "I wonder how my glasses are staying on." Fozzie:  "Glue?"       Floyd:  "This mustard ain't as hot as Janice exclusive Palisades toy."              From:  Kenni "The Juliet Prowse episode of the Muppets 'Mana Mana'."       July 2004      Example: Floyd:  "Tic-Tac?"            From: Kev Floyd: "...and the operator says, 'I didn't know you were a KOALA bear?!'...Well, it's funnier when Fozzie says it!"            From: Chase Floyd:   (Who has been talking to Animal for a half an hour.) Animal:   (not even listening anymore) *thinking* EWWW!!! he's got something in his teeth.            From: Adam Animal:  So, as I was saying life's tough sometimes. Floyd:  Totally.             From: Muley Animal:  I see his brain from this angle...looks like--fingers?   May/June 2004         Example: "Does this turban make me look fat?"       From: Ryan "Guys...come on! I'm not a Muppet! Get me out of this thing!"       From: Jimmy "Yepyepyepyepyepyepyep, uh-huh, uh-huh!"       From: Mike "Book your next vacation with the Traveling Gnome. Don't forget your hat!"       From: Iggy35 "Just your typical everyday passport photo."       From: Iggy35 "Another good one for www.mugshots.org"       From: Chickadee "No, no, no. The Ubergonzo is my brother. His hat is shinier."       From: Skeeter Muppet "...and I have a black one for formal occasions."       From: Chris Smigliano "I am NOT Papa Smurf! Now where's my coffee?"